Finding Chi

I have had a few very special moments in my life most of them were when I saw things in nature.  Glaciers in Alaska, grizzlies in the Rockies, the stars on a mountain top in Montana, a scuba dive in Majuro in the Marshall Islands, waterfalls in Honduras.  I felt something's that I couldn't explain, a sense of wonder a connection with nature.  I am not sure what it is but there was something that was more than myself.

I had an experience like that yesterday but the feeling I had was something that was very different than anything I have ever experienced. I was at Silent River Kung Fu's annual boot camp.  The boot camp in itself is an experience that is amazing.  This is the third year that I was able to attend and each year the experience is life changing.

This year something incredible happened.  I was able to feel my Chi.  Until yesterday Chi was an abstract concept that I understand intellectually. I have heard others describe it and was able to watch others experience Chi on my travels to Taipei. But for me it was such an advanced concept and a state of being that I could only understand it at the intellectual level and not at a spiritual level.

We started the day with a meditation walk and I was able to get myself into the moment.  I was truly just with the birds the trees and the dog barking. We were then put through numerous exercises to try and cultivate our Chi.  I was able to stay in the moment and then it happened. I felt my Chi.

I am not sure I can truly describe it but I felt that I had incredible power in my fingers and it was extending beyond my body.  I could feel it moving through my body. There was such an energy it had to have come from the earth as Chi has been described to me.  That kind of power could not have possibly come from me.

If I never learn anything more from my Kung Fu training I was able to experience a state that I think will be hard to match.  I am going to focus and train hard to get back to that feeling and state of being.

Summer Warmth

Summer is upon us and I do like the long days and the warm weather.   The time I get to spend outside is good for my thoughts.   I got home last night after training and was able to go out on my deck and just listen to the birds as the dogs laid in the sun as it was going down. 

I think there is something special about  living this far north.  My place is about 54 degrees north.  To have the sun out for such a long period of time at this time of year is something that many people never get to experience.  I have spent some time further north and it is even more impressive.

It is almost as we forget about the winter at this time of year as the weather is so nice.  I know that in the winter all I can usually think about is summer.  Sometimes to the point of doing ridiculous things.  This canoeing trip was done at minus 25  but a good time was had by all. (and yes I was wearing flip flops)

Happiness?

I was contemplating a lot of things over the last month.  I have been trying to get to what it  is that makes me happy.  Is it my family? Yes.  Is it  the people I get to spend time with each day? Yes.  Is it the places I get to go and the things I get to see? Yes.

Then I think, why am I not happy every moment of everyday.  What is it that creeps into my head and takes my focus away from these things that make me happy?  I am not sure what it is.  I am going through scenario after scenario in my head wondering and thinking why I can't be at a constant state of happiness.  Is it maybe unachievable?  Is a human not able to remain in a state of happiness?  I look at my dogs, they seem to always be happy.  If they can be happy all the time then why not me.

Are the transmitters in my head not firing correctly or do I need to not be happy sometimes in order to understand happiness.  I know that sounds weird but maybe that is the way it has to be.  But until I can figure it out I am going to have the goal of complete happiness.  I just hope it is something I can achieve someday.

back again

I just got back from vacation and just getting back into the swing of things.  I had a great time with my wife and saw some great things.  Thought I would post a few of my push up pics.


Crookedest Street in the World Lombard Street San Francisco

Golden Gate Bridge San Francisco

Kilauea Crater Rim. Hawaii

Lava Fields at base of Kilauea, Hawaii

Thurston Lava Tube Kilauea, Hawaii

Who gets me there?

How do we end up where we are?  Some will believe that it is forces,

people and circumstances around them that get them to where they are be it good bad or indifferent.  Or are we are where we are at because of many decisions make each and everyday.  I think the latter.

Every time we make a decision or don't make a decision we are going in a direction that only one person has control over and that is me.  If I want to be somewhere that I am not either emotionally, personally, financially, ethically or any where else;  it is only my decisions that can get me there.  There is no one else that I burden with where or how things are for me. Me and only me is the creator of where I am.  If I am not where I want to be; me and only me can get me there