For the last two or three months I have found myself not in my usual state of mind. I believe that I have had depression I talked about this many times with my wife and I was looking to go get medical treatment. Over the last month or so I have been able to spend many nights in the mountains and foothills and that has helped out significantly. I believe that I don't need medical treatment as things have shifted in my mind.
I have read a number of books that have brought me some clarity and made me feel better about where I am. But as with personal growth more questions have come to the forefront.
One of the things I have been challenged with is what is my life purpose or purposes. I have contemplated that and have come up with a few items but still do not know for sure what it is. Of the things that I do know my life purpose is, it is very unselfish. One of my life purposes is to make my family the most important thing in my life. To me this is unselfish as I am putting my boys and my wife ahead of me.
This is where I am finding conflict. As I try to rid my life of mediocracy I am getting better at doing this. As I try to pursue mastery I am finding this as a selfish motive. It is about me becoming better than I am but it seems to be focused on me internally. I do understand that if I am better as a person that it should translate to me better for the people around me.
I am truly conflicted with these two concepts. Both should make me a better person but it is the motive that is causing the conflict?
I would really appreciate any feedback on this. If you think I am out to lunch on this tell me. Just looking for some straight thoughts on this.
To be able to be good for others you have to be at peace in your own heart. There is nothing selfish about taking care and bettering yourself. The better you are within yourself, the better you'll be for your wife and kids. That's my thought.
ReplyDeleteI agree. Help yourself so you can better help others. Also, I feel this can work the other way too. Sometimes helping someone else allows you to gain perspective which in turn assists you on your path to mastery.
DeleteI agree. Help yourself so you can better help others. Also, I feel this can work the other way too. Sometimes helping someone else allows you to gain perspective which in turn assists you on your path to mastery.
DeleteHow many people have killed themselves by overworking and not taking care of themselves in the name of providing for their family? If being there for your family is the most important thing to you, then taking care of yourself - mentally and physically, must be a priority, if not THE priority.
ReplyDeleteThat is the first lesson my original kung fu instructor gave me. I totally disagreed at the time but thirty years later I finally understand his wisdom.
Like we talked about last week, perspective is everything. I definitely see where you are coming from but you are overthinking the situation. As Ms. Gibbons has said, the better you are within yourself, the more engaged and present you are in all situations. That is the main value you are bringing to your family - your engaged presence. Don't underestimate what taking care of your needs and wants does for that.