My Old Man

I wrote this a number of months back and it was more for me than anything.  But I thought I would post it as I see some healing for myself in making this public.

I have been struggling with the loss of my Dad.  He passed away last year at he beginning of June.  My dad and I had a great relationship from the time I was a kid.  I can't ever recall us ever having a harsh word between us.  I was not able to spend much time with him in the last few years of his life but was able to spend a significant amount of time with him in his last 8 months.

We got to spend a lot of time talking about my kids, growing up in the mountains, hiking, fishing and all the things I was able to do as a kid.  My dad taught me how to take care of myself and be reliant on myself in the bush. He was so confidant in my abilities that he allowed me to go back packing on my own when I was 12 years old.   I asked if I could head up the Moose River to go fishing and he told me ok.  He drove me out of town about 30 km to the start of the Moose and said he would be back in 4 days.  Now a day's it would be unheard of to allow a 12 year old to go out in the bush on his own.  I have taught my kids the lessons my Dad taught me,  I have confidence in their abilities but I still would not feel comfortable in allowing them to do a trip like that on their own.  My Dad told me that his Dad was letting him do trips on his own in the fourties when he was 8 and 9 in Northern Ontario.

That self reliance has translated into my adult life and  I have always taken pride in my ability to take care of myself and eventually my family.  It is tough for most everyone when they lose a parent. I continued to do fishing trips with my dad as an adult.  Some of my best memories as an adult are me and him on a hot train in the middle of the summer  going from Edmonton to Sioux Lookout in northern Ontario.  Then spending 3 or 4 days  fishing from sun up till sun down. 

Being able to learn from my Dad and spend time with him has kept me very humble over the years.  A simple camp fire can be an amazing way to spend a few hours and keep one grounded and focused on what truly is important in life.  Ones relationships with other people are what is important.